Jumpy
January 24th & 25th, 2022
Some days are good for two. They leave you with so many impressions and stories that you can't bring them back to one theme. It was certainly a day about going out of your comfort zone and relying on others.
Opportunistically, my roommate and I visited this town by bus - which is actually a lot harder than it sounds. It was about a forty-five minute walk to the actual hiking trail, which led us to the Endico waterfall. This trail was amazing, leading us through the valley, surrounded by muddy and rocky country hills on all sides. There’s something about a rough landscape that just makes me all jittery inside. It was also terrific weather, which helps. The song definitely rang true: the sky is so blue in Malibu. We ended up at the foot of the waterfall, where we took some pictures for the fellows back home.
Hungry for more, we attempted a trail alongside the water, going up the mountain. This was hiking for professionals, which neither of us were. The path was steep and slick - I ended up on all fours and still sliding down. My beginner course of bouldering was good for the beginning, but wouldn't help me get to the top. Preferring to return home with all my limbs and a head that works, we terminated the mission and climbed back down. It was a good thing the waterfall was up and running, so we could wash off all the dirt from the climb and laugh at ourselves. There, we met a German woman who lives in LA. This was actually the best thing that happened to us so far, because she offered to ride us to the bus stop and spare us a dangerous walk alongside the 1 freeway.
Like she recommended, we visited Malibu beach where we refuelled our tank with a sandwich at a trendy outdoors shopping mall. Paired with the green grass, beautiful people and nothing but the sounds of birds chipping, it was like arriving at an oasis. An American oasis, where you can order healthy food but get them in giant portions. As every serve seems to be enough for two, I fear I'll get fat here just through eating salads.
Too soothe our overfull bellies, we hiked to the lagoon where people were surfing and enjoying a beach day. In true Dutch-German fashion, we found a shortcut through the mudflat. Of course, the shallow wasn't as shallow as it looked, but we made it through without any scratches.
That evening, we turned a karaoke bar upside down with our peers at the hostel. As a retired singer-songwriter, I love karaoke. I'm the first and the last to grab that microphone. But Santa Monica karaoke is a whole different level. The people sang too well - way and way better than I ever could in a bar where I can't even hear myself. So it took a few beers and shots to enter the stage, but so I did, accompanied with friends. I hardly performed on the level I hold myself to - but then again, maybe I shouldn't want to. That dream is over. It's been about a year since I wrote my last lyrics. If that dream were my vocation, I should live it. Breathe it. Practice it. Now, it's merely become an activity for my own entertainment. And that crowd doesn't pay.
Maybe that's why I just want to write the day after. Except for my headache, I'm empty. I have nothing more to give to anyone for today. Most of my friends are gone and I'm definitely happy, yet somehow incredibly void. It's about time I start to work on myself. I love being able to do the stuff that I’m doing: I’d just wish to keep on doing them with more money in my pocket and a reassurance that I have a purpose in life. I’m nervous and eager to find a job that could offer me flexibility and fullfillment, and it’s getting hot beneath my feet. There are days of being in the moment and there are days to think ahead. I’ll just need to balance them, to truly be happy.
